Not All Men

By Janet D Joy

2nd BCJ

Not All Men!

We’ve been hearing a lot about this in recent days, and I thought to myself that there might be a different side to this. A lot of times, we’ve been watching about how we generalize men and their character. But, what we don’t see is that, on the other side, there are men who are also trying to create a better world.

Yes, not all men.

Not all men are abusers nor are they disrespectful of women. Not all men are toxic traitors nor are they intolerant. Not all men are trying to pull women back to their roots, instead, some men are trying to lift other women. We see a lot of it happening right in front of us, don’t we?

I’ve encountered experiences where I felt the most secure with the men in my life. Times when they stood as the strongest pillars of support and were able to recognize emotions from a women’s perspective.

I have seen men who emotionally drained the women around them, but I have also witnessed how some others took a step to uplift them from all the scars they’ve had to succumb to. There are also men, who are working constantly to better the men around them.

Yes, this is all happening.

We see men who take charge of responsibilities within and outside their households. We see men who are trying to recognize women and are trying to calm their emotional imbalances. We see men who let others confide in them. As we constantly talk about the men in our society who trod across the inhumane, we should not forget about those who are at least trying. To be more humane. To be more kind. To be more patient. And to be more receptive. We see men who calm themselves. Who carry their women so well, that they mutually learn to respect each other. We see families where the void of gender inequalities surrenders to emptiness.

We see a lot of this happening in this world of ours, where we estrange men who are trying to evolve.

We also see men who are genuine to the core of their souls. Men who constantly take the effort to unite the ties of love and connect the bridges of selflessness and generosity. Men who are walking the tides of solitude, yet build the strongest walls of refuge around them. We see men who are others’ shields and solace. We see men who are trying to make this world a better place for all of us to co-exist. We see men who build a foundation for other women to walk stronger and fiercer. And I think, all we have to do is wait and appreciate them for the change they are trying to create.

Now, we do not need others to teach all men how to respect women. They know it themselves. We do not need others to tell them how to treat another woman with due regard. They do it better themselves.

And the stigma we are trying to create around that men are emotionally stable beings is what needs to change. We need to learn how to empathize with their emotions too. We need to understand they are vulnerable beings and can have themselves shattered at any point. We need to learn to give respect, as we seek the same. We need to give equal space and let them create an emotional boundary for themselves. As every woman needs to be emotionally connected to a man, so should a man be given the freedom to be united the same way.

We should also begin to see the fire that burns from within their soul, as we connect men to cynical terms.

So the next time we set out to lodge against men, the term “not all men” should echo in our ears.

Because it is definitely not all men.

We are all striving to clear out the imbalances in this society and as we continue to grow up in a world that is constantly open to variabilities, we should start to recognize every gender in an improvising role, rather than effortlessly pointing our fingers toward them, not recognizing the right that they do.

We should allow the good to prevail, to wipe out the evil that exists.

And this is to those men,

thank you.

For being kind and soulful.

for holding the women in your life,

with pride

and respect.

For shouldering the trials,

yet striving to work better.

For making this world a better place.

And for letting another woman proudly say,

“NOT ALL MEN”